I am a Writer

This NaNoWriMo, this particular November over all others has become something very important and life-changing for me. Slowly, day by day, as I have focused my energy and my time on the process of writing. As I have allowed myself to commit to the process and to the flow. The month has proven to me – without a shadow of a doubt – that down deep in my very soul… I AM A WRITER.

Even as I write those words – and nearly roll my own eyes at the fact I said: “down deep in my very soul” – they are truer now than ever before.  I may have always written. I may have always had a love of words and storytelling. But there was always a part of me that doubted I could ever do this for a living. That it could ever be anything more than a hobby.

It was that doubt that never let me prioritize writing time. It was that doubt that made me think no one other than my friends and family would ever read a book I wrote. It was that doubt that made me question if I was even any good.

This November I have written every single day and only once have I fallen short of my target of 1,667 words per day.  And as my new novel takes shape and I let my characters tell their stories it has turned into a personal journey I hadn’t expected. It has proved cathartic and eye-opening as each page is filled.

I no longer doubt my ability. I no longer doubt my commitment or my passion. I no longer doubt that writing can be more than a hobby.

I know that when you feel something deep down in your very soul – yes I said it twice – it is a knowledge that cannot be denied.

19 days into this NaNoWriMo and it has given me more than just the 37,558 words added to my new novel. It has confirmed that I am indeed a writer.

And it feels good to know that…down deep in my very soul.

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